Happy New Year

Welcome 2010! I had multiple conversations with people yesterday about how much importance we put on New Year's eve. What is the big deal? Why is it that society has instilled this idea in our head that New Year's eve is a night to go to some wild party and get drunk and not even remember how you spent your first couple of hours of the new year? I even questioned my own notions yesterday about why New Year's eve to me is so important that I don't spend it by myself. Whats wrong with just hanging out with me? Even if I were alone on New Year's eve I know I would figure out ways to make it a special evening for myself. That wasn't the case though as I did share my New Year's eve with my best friend for a relaxing night of laughing and cooking.

The other faux pa of New Year's eve is to make yourself a New Year's resolution. Where and when was this created? I think every day can be a day to make resolutions and to start again, but for some reason people put great important on this one day and this one resolution and beating themselves up the rest of the year when they didn't lose that 10 pounds, or quit smoking, or any various resolutions one makes for the New Year. For everyone and anyone reading this, just remember not to put so much pressure on your new resolutions because growth and change take time no matter how committed we are to that change.

Anyways, I myself will also fall into the faux pa this year. I did a lot of reflection yesterday. I sat and meditated for a good 30 minute sit and thought about each month of last year. First of all, 2009 flew by and its weird to think that I can still see and feel each month so precisely as if it happened yesterday. Second, I realized how much baggage I have carried around with me. Its weighed me down emotionally, spiritually, physically. I carried my wounds like walls protecting myself from further damage. Since I have come home and have spent time searching myself for what I truly want for my life and in my life I feel as though I am finally coming into the person I always saw potential of being. I actually feel happy. Happy about me, about who I am, about where I am going in life. I beat myself up less for my mistakes, and when I do, I quickly use the tools I have learned to find the silver lining in any difficult situation.

Thus, my New Year's resolution is to let go. Let go of the past, let go of pain over situations that are no longer present, and be more fully present in the present. It is not a huge resolution, but it is something that I feel will make this year and the years to come smoother by integrating all my pieces (who I have been, who I am, and who I am going to become) with compassion and kindness. This New Year, treat yourself with more kindness, find more compassion for yourself and cultivate more compassion for others. No one ever means to hurt us, they are only protecting their own happiness. Forgive, never forget, but let go of the pain, and embrace life just the way it is.

Happy New Year.